Mental Health Moments: Three Ways To Manage Holiday Stress and Depression

⌛ By Kaylin R. Staten ⌛

Since I was a little girl, I have loved the holidays. There’s nothing quite like drinking a cup of coffee or hot chocolate, wrapping gifts, and listening to the Christmas classics. I love personalizing my Christmas trees (yes, plural) with my favorite ornaments, baking Christmas cookies, and basking in the glow of multi-colored lights.

However, with those happy holiday vibes comes a more sinister thought process that threatens to dampen my otherwise cheery mood: holiday stress. While I love the holiday season, there are times in which I buckle underneath the stress -- as I am staring up at my Christmas tree.

I’m going to be fully transparent here. I feel all of you introverted communicators, mental health warriors, and general Christmas lovers need to know that even the most Christmasy of Christmas lovers sometimes fights depression during this time of year. 

I usually put up my Christmas tree on Black Friday, but this year, we waited until this past weekend (Dec. 15) to put up our main tree. I put up my red tree a little bit earlier, but I was still feeling a lack of cheer. I still haven’t finished Christmas shopping, and my work has taken precedence over watching Christmas movies, baking cookies, and doing allofthethings. 

Having a miscarriage really knocked the wind out of my optimistic sails, and to be honest, I am still healing from it. Every day presents new challenges and new hopes, but grief still plagues me -- especially during this time of year.

I don’t have a perfect system to help balance holiday stress and depression, but these following tidbits may spark light at the end of the tunnel for you. 

Write about what ails you.

I’ve said this before and I will say it again: writing is and always will be my first professional love. That is how I can write this today, coming off the depressive state that pervaded my life for the past 2+ weeks. I had to write down everything in order to cleanse my mind. This isn’t a one-and-done situation. This takes time and effort, and when you’re stressed or depressed, you won’t feel like writing. Do it anyway. I wrote down 46 items in my journal that caused me stress and anxiety. 46 things! That is A LOT to worry about at once. Once you put pen to paper, you can start to relieve some of that weight that is likely taking a toll on your mind, muscles, and everyday life.

Be consistent. 

Try to stick to a schedule. This is especially challenging when people make last-minute holiday plans that throw you off your game or when you mess up that new recipe and have to start again from scratch. Keep pushing through the stress and the depression. We can’t always choose how our holidays will go. ‘Tis the season of compromise with family gatherings and time schedules. Be sure to do something that makes you happy (or an attempt to do something that usually makes you happy), even if it’s only for a few minutes. Get up, do things, go to bed, and then rinse and repeat that process. There have been days recently in which I have wanted to remain in bed playing Pocket Planes and watching “Law and Order: SVU.” Alas, responsibilities keep me from that, of which I am glad because it gets me up and moving. I’m able to complete tasks, even if I’m slower than usual. The point is, I am DOING them. Give yourself a break.

Talk with someone.

I love to internalize my problems like nobody’s business. I’ve put in those expert hours at doing this, actually. I think that I can handle everything myself, but that isn’t true. While I am highly independent and component, I need to have help sometimes, too. Talk with someone about your depression or stress, even if that is a challenge for you. My husband is my go-to person because he understands every facet of me and loves and accepts me for who I am, depression/anxiety/stress and all. Find your person, and communicate with that person. If you don’t have someone or don’t feel comfortable, find a healthy outlet. Scheduling a therapist appointment around the holidays works wonders, too, especially with grief counseling during the holidays.

Here’s to hoping that you and I have a Merry little Christmas with limited stressors and depression. 

Please note: These blog posts are not clinical, although we will provide symptoms and other information. These posts are based on my experiences with anxiety and mental health in general. If you or someone you know needs help, visit a website like Mental Health America to learn more.

Mental Health Moments blog posts are every other Tuesday of the month. Our CEO and contributors highlight what it's like to live with a mental health disorder and continue to fight the stigma through storytelling.

Kaylin R. Staten, APR, is an award-winning public relations practitioner and writer based in Huntington, WV with nearly 16 years of professional communications experience. As CEO and founder of Hourglass Media, she uses her compassionate spirit and expertise to delve into the heart of clients’ stories. She is a recovering perfectionist, mental health advocate, wife, cat mom and Leia Organa aficionado. Connect with Kaylin on LinkedIn.